Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Do I have OCD, or do I just like to clean? What is OCD?

Mom's Thoughts:

Like a lot of people, I've used the acronym OCD flippantly to describe myself before, "Oh, I'm a little OCD about this," even though I do not have OCD.  I have misused other such references, "Oh, I'm so ADD today, I can't keep my mind on what I'm doing!" when I don't have ADHD at all, I'm just being a flake or am overextended.

I guess we all have some obsessive or compulsive tendencies - maybe we call them "pet peeves." One of my pet peeves is dirty baseboards - something I attribute to my dad.  He always had us kids cleaning the baseboards, something I thought of as a huge waste of time when I was young, but now do it almost every time I am talking on the phone because it's an easy, mindless task and makes me feel productive.  Some may call that compulsive; I just like my baseboards clean.

But to say, "Oh, I'm a little OCD too - I keep my house (office, car, etc.) very clean and organized.  It's not that big of a deal,"  shows a great ignorance of the disorder and the amount of pain and suffering it causes its victims.  Yes, my hand is up too; until a couple of months ago I didn't know anything about it really either.  I just saw a video of Howie Mandel (love that guy!) in an interview with Larry King (not so much love for that guy!) that illustrates perfectly to me the pervasive ignorance in society about OCD and mental illness in general.  If you don't already know, Howie Mandel is a very open sufferer of OCD, and that was the topic of this portion of his interview with Larry:



So that begs the question, "What is OCD?"  Is it, as Larry King suggests, simply liking a certain amount of order in your medicine cabinet or in your home?  A disclaimer:  I am not a doctor or a psychologist!  I haven't even stayed in a Holiday Inn Express!  (OK, corny commercial reference.) But I have done a lot of research lately and have compiled a quick (i.e. not complete) answer that hopefully gives a pretty good summary.  The following paragraph is quoted from a very helpful website called HelpGuide.org:

What is obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)?

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is an anxiety disorder characterized by uncontrollable, unwanted thoughts and repetitive, ritualized behaviors you feel compelled to perform. If you have OCD, you probably recognize that your obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors are irrational – but even so, you feel unable to resist them and break free.
Like a needle getting stuck on an old record, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) causes the brain to get stuck on a particular thought or urge. For example, you may check the stove twenty times to make sure it’s really turned off, wash your hands until they’re scrubbed raw, or drive around for hours to make sure that the bump you heard while driving wasn’t a person you ran over. 

OCD signs and symptoms: Obsessive thoughts

Common obsessive thoughts in obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) include:

  • Fear of being contaminated by germs or dirt or contaminating others.
  • Fear of causing harm to yourself or others.
  • Intrusive sexually explicit or violent thoughts and images.
  • Excessive focus on religious or moral ideas.
  • Fear of losing or not having things you might need.
  • Order and symmetry: the idea that everything must line up “just right.”
  • Superstitions; excessive attention to something considered lucky or unlucky.

OCD signs and symptoms: Compulsive behaviors

Common compulsive behaviors in obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) include:

  • Excessive double-checking of things, such as locks, appliances, and switches.
  • Repeatedly checking in on loved ones to make sure they’re safe.
  • Counting, tapping, repeating certain words, or doing other senseless things to reduce anxiety.
  • Spending a lot of time washing or cleaning.
  • Ordering or arranging things “just so.”
  • Praying excessively or engaging in rituals triggered by religious fear.
  • Accumulating “junk” such as old newspapers or empty food containers.  

Me again:
So you can see, OCD isn't simply about being super clean (a common misconception) or being a "washer/cleaner" (the most well-known type of OCD.)  Many of those who suffer from OCD have more than one "type" - they may be a washer and a checker, for example.  A much lesser-known type of OCD that Elizabeth also suffers from (in addition to being a washer/cleaner & a checker,) she also has harm/aggressive obsessions, where distressing, violent images intrude upon her mind suddenly and repetitively at random times.  At times, they are so vivid and convincing to her, they seem like memories - like what she's "seeing" has actually happened.  (Imagine you think your car has just been hit by a semi and your sisters are dead next to you.  Sound distressing to you?  Yep, does to me too.)  They are so disturbing to her, they can set off a panic attack very quickly.  She's never experienced anything traumatic in her life - at least, nothing more traumatic than not getting picked for the team or making a bad grade on a test or running out of Fruit Roll Ups or whatever.  So where do these thoughts/images come from?  No one knows. 

These thoughts and compulsions can begin to intrude so much on your life that you can't function normally - you can't concentrate enough to work or study because of intrusive thoughts; you are constantly late because you have to complete your compulsions before you can leave the house, and it can take longer and longer to do that as your OCD worsens; you have chronic skin problems and/or are embarrassed in public situations due to your excessive hand-washing or checking rituals; you have difficulty sleeping or relaxing because of OCD.  OCD is a serious mental illness that arises out of anxiety, and can actually worsen anxiety issues. 

If you or someone you love suffers from OCD, you know that it is not a fun thing to have.  It often accompanies other problems as well, such as generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, social anxiety, and depression.  Diagnosing what you have and getting proper treatment can be tricky.   BUT from everything I've read, OCD is treatable!  Many people find relief with the proper medication.  Medicating oneself (and especially one's child!) is controversial, and I don't want to start a debate - everyone has to decide what is best for him- or herself.  For Elizabeth, medication to reduce her anxiety has been critical although not a complete fix.  We tried modifying her diet, relaxation and visualization techniques, yoga and exercise, but in the end she needed medication to find any relief whatsoever.  But there is no "magic pill" (darn it!!)  Research shows that cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) works very well to reduce and possibly eliminate symptoms.  I will post more about that and what Elizabeth has been doing in a later blog.  In the meantime, read up on what you can do to help yourself or your loved one, and find a good psychologist that specializes in anxiety and OCD if you don't already have one.

And if you have anything that has worked for you, please share it!  I am just beginning to learn about these things.  I want to open up discussion for everyone suffering - evil things whither in the light!  Let's bring it out in the open, into the light, and begin healing!

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